CFLC in the News

Chosen Family: When Policies Don’t Include or Protect Us All

People without children, those who are single, and diverse families remain excluded from status quo economic and family policies. Further, economic models that drive the social status quo, force policies that are neither inclusive, nor do they meet the realities of the population. The needs of households for individuals and relationships, which include chosen family require the same level of rights and protection granted to traditional family structures and households. What can we do to advocate for policy that reflects inclusive and equitable needs for our communities?

 Tune in to learn more about the incredible work of these organizations and their founder, and how you can join us in taking action for continued change, which includes and protects us all. 

Listen to the interview or read the transcript here:

https://newlegacyinstitute.com/chosen-family-when-policies-dont-include-or-protect-us-all-guest-diana-adams

Watch our Executive Director Diana Adams' popular TED talk here:

https://www.ted.com/talks/diana_adams_why_us_laws_must_expand_beyond_the_nuclear_family

Why US laws must expand beyond the nuclear family

The nuclear family model may no longer be the norm in the US, but it's still the basis for social and economic benefits like health care, tax breaks and citizenship. Lawyer and LBGTQIA advocate Diana Adams believes that all families, regardless of biological relationship or legal marriage, are deserving of equal legal rights and recognition. They present a vision for how US laws can benefit all families -- from same-sex bonds to multi-parent partnerships -- and explain how a more inclusive definition of family could strengthen your relationships and community.

https://www.theatlantic.com/family/archive/2020/09/how-build-three-parent-family-david-jay/616421/

"Diana Adams, the founder of Chosen Family Law Center, says that interest in this option has been growing over the past 15 years, spurred by the increasing acceptance of queer families and the popularity of assisted-reproduction technologies...  

Just as marriage provides benefits that cohabitation doesn’t, legal tri-parenting creates stability and rights that less formal arrangements lack. According to Adams, in tri-parenting arrangements that aren’t legally recognized, a break between the two legal parents might mean that the third parent can be denied access or custody to the child, even if they’ve always been an important and beloved part of the child’s life. The nonlegal parent’s status is also vulnerable in the case of a tragedy—for example, if the two legal parents were to pass away without wills, and without formalizing the role of the third parent, a disapproving relative could take the child away and the third parent would have little legal recourse.

For Adams, tri-parenting is a way of reclaiming the “diversity and beauty of the queer community.” When it comes to queer rights, the big fight of past decades has been to legalize gay marriage, which has been significant, but has also played into the narrative that the two-parent family is and should be the default structure. “That has taken away some of the power of being able to live radically queer lives without needing to fit into a capitalist, patriarchal structure of a nuclear family,” Adams told me."

 https://www.psychologytoday.com/ca/blog/the-polyamorists-next-door/202007/legal-protections-people-in-polyamorous-relationships

"During her decades serving as a legal advocate for families of sex and gender minorities, Adams has witnessed what the lack of legal protections can do to families who are left vulnerable to stigma and discrimination. “All families deserve the support of legal stability and recognition, including the many polyamorous partners among our clients and communities. 

Many in polyamorous relationships will now benefit from health insurance coverage through their partners, which is essential especially in these times of COVID-19. Ultimately, we shouldn't need to depend upon our employers or relationships for health insurance, but while that is our American system, those in polyamorous relationships shouldn't lack health insurance coverage because some disapprove of their relationship configuration.”

While this small step towards legal protection is enforceable only within a highly localized area, it is nevertheless significant. When cities enact ordinances such as these at the local level, it can serve to inspire others to consider and perhaps even craft similar protections of their citizens. Adams concludes, “At Chosen Family Law Center, we plan to introduce similar domestic partnership ordinances in progressive cities, and welcome local advocates to get in touch for support and collaboration. Somerville is just the beginning of a movement for partnership protections for polyamorous and multi-parent families.” 

https://www.nytimes.com/2020/07/01/us/somerville-polyamorous-domestic-partnership.html 

Andy Izenson, a lawyer with the Chosen Family Law Center, a nonprofit organization that provides legal services to polyamorous and other nontraditional families, said the ordinance could be put to a judicial test if health insurance companies reject the city’s more expansive definition of domestic partnership. It could also run into resistance from conservatives, as same-sex marriage did in 2015.

Or it could, as he put it, “fly under the radar.”

“When one area does it, and it serves as a test case, and legislators see that the town or county has not had a culture war implosion,” he said, “that’s how things spread.”

 https://vietnamtimes.org.vn/polyamory-new-trend-of-the-us-families-22073.html

 Andy Izenson, a lawyer at Chosen Family Law Center, a nonprofit organization that provides legal services to polyamorous and other nontraditional families, said the ordinance could be put to a judicial test if health insurance companies reject the city’s more expansive definition of domestic partnership. It could also run into resistance from conservatives, as same-sex marriage did in 2015, according to New York Times.  

 https://www.cbsnews.com/news/somerville-massachusetts-recognizes-polyamorous-relationships/

Andy Izenson, senior legal director of Chosen Family Law Center in New York, told the Journal that Somerville's ordinance is a step in the right direction.

"I think it's pretty amazing — strategies like this are the best chance we have of moving towards a legal understanding of family that's as comprehensive as it needs to be to serve all families," Izenson said. 

"I've seen a few other small-scale or local entities that have taken steps towards recognizing that relationships between adults are not only between two adults, but this is the first time I have seen this strategy brought to fruition."

https://www.ibtimes.com/massachusetts-city-council-unanimously-approves-polyamory-domestic-partnerships-3005273

Unmarried partners commonly run into legal problems because there is no legal framework to protect their rights. Chosen Family Law Center director Andy Izenson hailed Sommerville's ordinance.

"I think it's pretty amazing — strategies like this are the best chance we have of moving towards a legal understanding of family that's as comprehensive as it needs to be to serve all families," Izenson said.

 https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nation/2020/07/02/polyamory-massachusetts-city-somerville-relationships-us/5370718002/

Chosen Family Law Center's Senior Legal Director Andy Izenson told the Journal that he had never seen any town adopt such a broad policy.

“I think it’s pretty amazing – strategies like this are the best chance we have of moving towards a legal understanding of family that’s as comprehensive as it needs to be to serve all families,” Izenson said. “I’ve seen a few other small-scale or local entities that have taken steps towards recognizing that relationships between adults are not only between two adults, but this is the first time I have seen this strategy brought to fruition.”

 https://www.boston.com/news/local-news/2020/07/02/somerville-votes-to-officially-recognize-polyamorous-relationships

Andy Izenson, a lawyer with the Chosen Family Law Center, a nonprofit organization that provides legal services to polyamorous families, said the ordinance could be put to a judicial test if health insurance companies reject the city’s more expansive definition of domestic partnership. It could also run into resistance from conservatives, as same-sex marriage did in 2015. 

Or it could, as he put it, “fly under the radar.”

“When one area does it, and it serves as a test case, and legislators see that the town or county has not had a culture war implosion,” he said, “that’s how things spread.”

https://www.wgbh.org/news/politics/2020/07/02/somerville-recognizes-polyamorous-and-other-multiple-adult-families

“The first civil unions were a really exciting turning point for people in same-sex couples,” she said. “And we’re now at that moment this week with polyamorous couples and other multi-adult families.”

Beyond being a step toward acceptance, it’s tough to know what the Somerville ordinance will mean from a legal standpoint for multiple-partner families, she said.

“This would define domestic partnership and extend rights that are similar to marriage just within Somerville, Massachusetts — which is fairly limited,” she said.

For example, Adams said city employees should now be able to extend health benefits to multiple domestic partners, but it’s unclear whether a private employer in Somerville would have to do the same.

Nevertheless, Adams said she believes this will be the start of a trend, and suspects other municipalities will soon follow Somerville’s lead.

https://www.bostonglobe.com/2020/07/02/metro/somervilles-polyamory-ordinance-is-first-nation/

“The Somerville ordinance is an exciting turning point for people who are polyamorous or in multipartner families,” said Diana Adams, the executive director of the Chosen Family Law Center in New York. “There has been tremendous momentum and energy and hope for this for many years.”

 https://www.bostonherald.com/2020/07/02/somerville-approves-polyamorous-relationship-policy-more-than-two-people-can-be-in-official-domestic-partnership/

“This has done something really amazing in the discourse of family relationships, and the possibilities that it has opened up,” said Andy Izenson of the Chosen Family Law Center, adding that the approved Somerville policy is the first such one to pass in the country.

“It’s really exciting,” Izenson said. “It’s the bottom-up community work like this that creates genuine social change and acceptance

 
https://somerville.wickedlocal.com/news/20200701/somerville-recognizes-polyamorous-domestic-partnerships  

"It’s the first time that family law attorney Andy Izenson has seen a municipality do anything like this.

Izenson is the senior legal director, vice president, and secretary of the nonprofit Chosen Family Law Center in New York. The center also has an initiative, the Poly Families Project, which offers direct, affordable legal support to polyamorous families across the country.

“I think it’s pretty amazing – strategies like this are the best chance we have of moving towards a legal understanding of family that’s as comprehensive as it needs to be to serve all families,” said Izenson. “I’ve seen a few other small-scale or local entities that have taken steps towards recognizing that relationships between adults are not only between two adults, but this is the first time I have seen this strategy brought to fruition.”

Izenson noted states recognizing third-parent adoptions as action that is close to offering broader rights to families, but pointed out that most gains in “marriage equality” have all been carefully defined as between two people.

“There’s a reflexive flinch away from families including more than two partners,” they said.

Izenson called out mainstream media, certain sects of Christianity, and the bottom-line of capitalism for maintaining this cultural flinch. For example, health insurance companies are incentivized to limit the definition of family so they do not have to cover more people.

Regardless, Izenson is hopeful that this move indicates even a small change in the way we think about the legal rights of families.

“There are two kinds of legal advocacy: the bottom-up kind and the top-down kind,” they said. “Top-down meaning law that comes from the Supreme Court...which, in terms of day-to-day life is more reflective of culture change than leading the way. This type of bottom-up work – local people making policy regarding their neighbors – that’s the sort of thing that’s not only reflective of a culture shift, but a shift towards acceptance and support of a broader variety of families.” 

In October 2019, Diana was interviewed about our legal practice as part of a CBSN Originals 23-minute documentary on consensually non-monogamous partnerships and families: Speaking Frankly: Non-monogamy.  

Following that, Diana had a one-on-one interview with CBS news anchor Tanya Rivero to more fully discuss the challenges for non-monogamous and LGBTQ+ families, including child custody, immigration and health insurance. You can view that interview here: Diana Adams on “Legal Hurdles in Non-Monogamous Relationships”